He’s Not Heavy… He’s My Brother

(Today’s Author is Jenny from MWM Torquay)

Evening all. I hope you’ve had a lovely weekend and if, like me, you have school aged children and have reached the end of a largely wet and cold Easter holidays (with everyone still in one piece) then I congratulate you! I’m really looking forward to getting back into my routine this week and welcome the return to our lovely Music with Mummy and Jolly Babies sessions.

Anyway, did you see that this week we ‘celebrated’ National Siblings Day? No obviously we didn’t actually celebrate – although I’ve just realised that it was a missed opportunity to eat cake. However, with it being the Easter holidays and therefore having my two children together again at home it gave me a chance to think about the interesting dynamic that is being a sibling. And after my two careful weeks of scientific investigation I can reveal that in my house being siblings largely consists of FIGHTING!

Almost all sibling fights stem from:

1. Wanting the same thing at the same time. It doesn’t matter if there are two of these items in our house they absolutely must have the same one.
2. Random punching from Edward.
3. High level manipulation and button-pushing that only a 5-year old girl is capable of from Isabelle.

So, full scale wars have erupted over the last fortnight and always when I’m busy. No, not ‘filing my nails busy’ or ‘talking on the phone busy’ but ‘making the lunch busy’ or ‘hanging out the washing busy’. On Tuesday morning Edward appeared with a bleeding nose while I was peeling eggs for the picnic at the zoo! It’s been a bundle of laughs!!! I’ve drunk a fair quantity of wine in the evenings!


However, the funny thing about all the fighting is that there is some unwritten rule saying only they are allowed to be unkind to each other. Outside of our house and around other children they become fiercely protective of each other. In short, they become a team. So Isabelle wasn’t going to take any nonsense from the 3-year old who tried to throw her brother from the car at soft play. (No she didn’t fight the boy she came and ‘told’. Nobody in the world loves ‘telling’ as much as primary school girls.) Also when Edward disappeared into the 3-storey soft play climbing frame, I sent her “To check he’s ok.” She’s only about 5cm taller and they weigh the same but the child can argue that black is white so I knew she’d have his back should some slide-related standoff ensue.

Like all siblings they also love to get each other into trouble (more tale telling)! Although ironically they actually hate it if I am cross and tell one of them off. In our house the naughty step doesn’t really work as Isabelle will go and sit with Edward until he’s served his ‘time’. And yes it is only ever Eddie on the naughty step!


So it’s an emotional, powerful, frustrating and joyful relationship being a sibling but I honestly believe it plays a huge part in shaping the person you become. I have two brothers and I have grown into an extremely calm and patient person. Read into that what you will! At our music groups it’s really common for one child to try and take something from another. What’s funny is that those with siblings either:

a) Let it go without making any fuss – they’re very used to having things taken off them.
b) Don’t let go of it at all – they don’t take any of that nonsense, they’ve learned to stand their ground.

In either case we always laugh about it and invariably the adult will say “He/She’s so used to it they’ve got an older brother/sister.”

So whether you are a sibling or have siblings in your household I’m sure you’ll agree that it’s a really unique and special relationship. Next year perhaps I will celebrate it – although I will have to make sure the celebration involves exactly the same amount of cake in each bowl which is the same colour!!!

Jenny x x x

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